Love is complicated.
I have a new-found respect for all the single parents out there.  I was already amazed at the job they do.  I was raised in a single parent home (my parents divorced when I was 13) so I am aware of what a thankless job it is to raise kids.  What brought about this new enlightenment?  I am now essentially a single parent myself.
Hubby has a job out-of-state. Â For the last four months, I’ve been adjusting to not only a long distance relationship but being a solo parent. Â Yes, hubby is in constant contact but it’s not the same as being here. Â It’s not an ideal situation but one that many families face every day.
And you want to know the truth about single parenting. Â It makes you tired. Â Like all the time. Â You have to do everything. Â Everything? Â Everything! Â It ranges from the routine morning, school, work, homework, dinner act to the more mundane answering of every question. Â No more passing off to the other parent. Â (Go ask your Dad has lost its effectiveness.)
Here is my plan. Â I’m going to take some vitamins, get some rest, and get back to parenting these kids. Â To all my fellow single parents out there I say, “Hang in there.”
I know the movie hasn’t come out yet (Oct. 19th) but I just had to say it. Â Tyler Perry isn’t Alex Cross. Â Can’t be. Â Why? Â Glad you asked.
You know how an actor will play a role for so long that they can never be associated with any other character. Â Think Jaleel White as Urkel or Christopher Reeves as Superman. Â To me, Tyler Perry is Madea. Â Ma to the damn D, E, A. Â I’ve seen him play that character so much that even in his more serious roles (Good Deeds, The Family that Preys, etc.) I can’t get past it. Â Maybe it’s a limitation on my part.
I’m sure Tyler probably does a decent job in this movie. Â He is a hard-working individual that respects the craft. Â But who made the casting decision? Â You can’t follow Morgan “Academy Award winner” Freeman with someone who wears women dresses for laughs.
I remember reading something about Idris Elba being considered. Â I can see that. Â Hubby and I were discussing various actors and he mentioned Anthony Mackie. Â Now that I can clearly see.
I just watched the trailer again and Cicely Tyson is in the movie. Â Can’t be all bad, I guess. Â Still, I’ll take a wait and see approach to this film.
Women should really pay attention this election cycle. Get informed!
Everyone has favorites.  Maybe a favorite color (purple) or a favorite food (lasagna).  You may even have a favorite person.  This person is typically considered your best friend.  But what about when it comes to family?  Should you have a favorite?  More specifically, should you have a favorite child and/or grandchild?
I hate to generalize, but I believe in most families with more than one child, there is a favorite.  Family dynamics may vary but everyone typically knows who this child is.  From the gist of this post, one can assume that the “favorite” child status is not me.  And I was cool with it.  I can accept a loved one shortcomings even if said shortcoming meant that I was considered the level-headed one that didn’t demand a lot of attention.
And then I had kids of my own. Â I love my two girls in different ways but I love them the same. Â Hubby and I are very sensitive about showing favoritism. Â What we do for one child, we do for the other.
Other people, family members included, may not show the same restraint.  What to do about a grandparent that shows blatant favoritism toward the other grandchildren?  What do you do when your child has been hurt by the callous disregard from a grandparent?  Talking doesn’t help.  This person doesn’t think they did anything wrong.  My only recourse to protect my children is by keeping them away from their grandparent.  Somehow that doesn’t seem right either.
Playing favorites. Â Everyone has them. Â But in families, playing that game can only push people apart.
I love these lists.
I open my eyes to another new day
And remember all over again
That you are not here
My heart longs for you.
******
I go through the motions
Of living a life
Kids, work and bills
My mind stays on you.
******
I lay awake at night
Remembering your smile, your scent
Your presence
My hands want to hold you.
******
I am every woman
Strong enough on my own
But with you I feel invincible
My soul needs you.
(c) 2012 Michelle Rayford